Mr Brand Conscious - Domino Costa

Mr Brand Conscious - Domino Costa
In this strange little world of ours, there are various categories of 'conscious' people, there are the fashion conscious, there are the health conscious, brand conscious and then there is Mr Domino Costa who is an extreme case of all the above.
A single look at Mr DC and you see the "Who's your daddy now ??" look plastered all over his face. I dont think he even bothers to look around at the poor non-brand-conscious souls around him. As he strides royally through the bay everyone feels the brands in the air, every step Costa takes is a brand, everything he wears is branded, right to the last thread of his underwear, one can feel the brands in every last molecule carbon-dioxide he breathes out.
He is head and shoulders above his contemporaries, no one can match his intelligence, Einstein its so sad I cannot challenge you. Mr Bill Gates lets get it on, Steve Jobs I can put you out of your job. These are the things you feel the guy thinks, when you catch a glimpse of DC's "Who's your daddy now ??" expression.
A day in the life of Domino Costa :
The alarm sets off on his Rolex watch with the tone of SRK's "I am the best, I am the best" song. DC gets up from his ultra soft bed made specially for him from the best sponge available. He makes his way to his italian marble floored bathroom with a Chinese ceramic basin, with a golden tap through the faucet of which flows Bisleri mineral water at 23 degree celcius so that Mr Costa's flawless skin remains flawless.All the while wearing pure Chinese silk pyjamas. He then takes his shower with Himalaya's bottled water at 33.5 degree celcius, to keep his hair as silky as ever. Puts on his Jockeys and Calvin Kleins(whichever is more expensive), then his Armani shirt and pants, Rolex watch, Police spectacles, Gucci shoes. Drinks his favourite Costa coffee in his sandalwood lined balcony so that the maximum possible number of people can see the Costa mug in his hand. Some say he even has a "Tera Baap Costa hai" tatoo on his hand.
Mr DC hates everything thats unbranded, he loathes people who use unbranded stuff. Once he even refused to relieve himself for 3 days until he got his brand of mineral water in the restroom.

Costa doesnt believe in getting out of the house with anything on himself unbranded, but according to him the most important things to wear is ,his "Who's your daddy now ??" look before heading off into the world full of less fortunate unbranded people !!

Coal's Keyboard

Its 10 pm and I am just recovering from being physically molested for about 10 hours now. The bastard doesnt give me a second's respite, once he presses the first key stroke he follows it with a million more at a rapid pace. I guess his skinny fingers must be the strongest part of his Machinist-esque body. I scream so loudly everytime he attacks me that my voice can be heard till Banashankari and sometimes even Hebbal. But Mr "Count my ribs in one go" doesnt show any mercy. To add to my misery, being a mainframe keyboard, Coal doesnt even spare my "function" keys, they are attacked regualrly too !!! Atleast windows keyboards have their special "function" keys spared. Since my function keys are so damaged, I dont think I will be capable of carrying my legacy forward. I will end up as the last keyboard of my generation, thanks to that weightless skinny son of a b&#$*. My state is so bad my 'A', 'S' , 'S' are wiped off. There's only some blank space left in place of my 'BAR'. My cousin "the mouse" is also not immune to this domestic violence, his "ball" has been damaged. My half-sister who is employed Master Oogway(MO) seems to be having the time of her life. MO uses the lowest force possible on every keyboard stroke, also because of MO's office stay duration she hardly works 4-5 hours a day with alternate Fridays or Sundays off.
Now that Coal is going on a vacation(after about 3000 years) I am planning to slip out at night and exchange myself with MO's keyboard or another person of whom I have heard doesnt use his keyboard at all, his name is Manager Anisheee. If I am not successful at that, believe me this is the last you will hear from me.

Regards

Coal's keyboard.